Saturday, March 7, 2015

It's so unlike you to be blue

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So....um, hi, I guess? Haha.
2 months plus since 2015 started, and I can say I'm still trying to rise from breakdowns <( ̄︶ ̄)>
Assuring myself that I had enough experiences from last semesters, I limit myself from taking part in steering committees/student activities, and promised to focus on improving my study instead.
But less time thinking about juggling job and assignment means more time for my mind to wander around; which is not good at all.
I'd spend hours comparing my life to others, my mind would repeat the piercing memories on how people treat me, and every second passes in the class I can't stop thinking about how I want to go home and waste my time alone.
I've had my share of harsh times. And to escape from reality is to find distractions. Tumblr was really helpful, I kid you not. It's an eye opener, a shelter, a spring of bitter humor to make you forget where you are for a while.
Well, by logging in, I can't stop scrolling ╥﹏╥ I certainly can't do creative process with a cloudy mind. But it takes a long, loooong time to lift up the fog, and when I see the clock it's already 2 AM. I'm forced to sacrifice my sleep, which helps me build a bad mood for the next day, only to invites bad thoughts again. It's a cycle......

Just a midnight rambling, though. I hope by the time the future me sees this post, things have been in a much, much better state! Hopefully I can manage my time (and thoughts, ugh) better, too.
Closing the post with uplifting song which has helped me a lot lately! (*´・v・) 

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